What Grinds My Gear
FINALLY!!! Geezz… I’ve been trying to access this Friendster blog for the last 48 hours, but some dudes in charge of this website won’t let me through. It really grinds my patience whenever I blithely tried to enter this site but rather than directing me to its homepage it shows these big bold letters that says “TEMPORARY MAINTENANCE” instead.
Anyway…
Today after I woke up, I felt this urge to write something… problem is… I don’t even know what I would like to write here. So I figure out to write anything that appears on my mind right away. So let’s see where this is going at…
ENJOY!
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[Note: Let’s face it. You always skip the intro and will never read. Shame on you though, literacy kicks ass!]
So here’s my story.
2 weeks ago I developed quite a huge lump on my rear right ear. It became so red and swollen that I thought it would explode anytime soon. I’m not gonna give more details about this as I thought it would be sickening.
Anyhow my mom thought it was extremely dangerous (not to mention gross) to just pretend that that lump was never even existed. She hypothesized that this might be a form of tumor while my brother thought that I contacted this lump from unprotected sex; honestly, I prefer the latter hypothesis. But both my Mom and my bro urged me to go to my campus’ clinic right away.
Unaware of how disturbing my ear looks like, I ignored their concerns, proceeded to go to my class, and forgetting their advice. Fortunately it seems that nobody in the class notices my lump as they all seemed to be busy with his/her class…..hahahaha lucky me! =)
…..
…..
…..
……Ofcourse I was being sarcastic since no one would shut up about it. They pointed their ugly fingers at me and asked me if I’m aware that I have this swollen lump. Ofcourse I’m aware! Duh. Some of them even asked my permission to touch or even take a photograph of my ear. I instantly killed that kind of people right away with my two bladed swords. [yes, I always keep my swords in my purse. They’re really handy in times of need teehee!]
Ugh. I always hate it when people are staring at me. So I figure that I have to eliminate this lump to avoid my sudden popularity and went straight to the clinic that evening.
The doctor there diagnosed me with a streptocci? Strepctocceel? Infection….something like that and told me the three precautions I should take so that I could lose this nuisance: (1)She prescribed me with some antibiotics that I should take on religiously, (2)She told me not to touch/press/do anything stupid that I could think of to my lump and (3)told me to return for a follow up check up next week.
I followed her every precautions and advices, except that I occasionally forget to take my meds and toying around with my boil-like lump leading to its rather epic explosion. My ear proceeded to uncontrollably gushing out the blood and pus from the inside out….and…uhh… Well you get the picture.
[Moral of the story: Never trust AUP’s clinic… see what happen to me? I hope you guys learn from my experience. Xp]
Well folks, anyway I’m proud to tell you that at least I followed her last precaution… so I went back to the clinic last week on my lunch hour. After waiting for 2 hours for my turn, the nurse who worked there innocently told me that he lost my medical record and I have to get back that evening instead. I politely smile at him while cutting his throat with my sword and agree to return that evening.
I went back again that evening to find out that the nurse have already been replaced with a new one (I wondered what happen with the nurse that I see that afternoon…) and told me to sit down while she processed my medical record. She asked me my problem and I told her that I got a skin infection on my rear ear. She nodded in reply as if she understands what I’m saying and proceeded to check my body temperature, blood pressure, and my heart beats.
Confused of a series of unrelated tests that she performed on me, I asked her if it’s necessary for her to check my body temperature and stuff for a rather ordinary skin infection. She stared back at me and asked me if I’m a doctor or something. “No.” I replied. “Then shut up and let me do my work,” She replied.
I lose my patience and pulled out my sword and cut her head off.
“This is insane,” I muttered, “I’d rather go home.”
And so… I went home without seeing the doctor, not knowing whether I have some consequences that I might face if I didn’t visit her again or if I will still survive for breaking the rules. But well, that’s another story for another day.
THE END
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WRITER’S NOTE: This is actually a satirical column, meaning some parts of the stories are true. As I mention before, I went for a follow-up check up as the doctor requested. Turns out that my medical record has been neglected and they have to process my medical record again for one and a half hour. They tickle my funny bones when I read their vision statement: to give a quality service. Hah!
….but other than that the whole story is just a fabrication.
The people in the clinic are actually approachable and nice…. However, they’re just a bit irresponsible.
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